Jul
01.
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What a powerful day for me… a spiritual based day for me … I woke up rather early cuz I had made plans to go to a WOMENS MEETING, which I heard about this particular one for a very long time… I have to say it was a just as what I heard ….POWERFUL… it was in the PALISADES…my girlfriend and I took a beautiful drive out there…. I just felt wonderful afterwards…

I then came back to my POCKETSIZE’S casa creative where I did phoners (interviews) for a while for EPISODE 2 of CELEBRITY REHAB , which airs this SUNDAY on VH1… I love doing them… I have a wonderful team … My MANAGER MARKI COSTELLO has a great passion for what she does and a great vision…. I’m honored to say that she believes in me and sees how to market me….ohhhhh I’m sooooo excited for my future…. my other part of my team is my PUBLICIST VALERIE ALLEN and she is a force… she seriously is a bad ass… she also has her team too… Valerie has been away on vacation and I’ve been working w EMILY INGERSOLL who is w Valerie’s camp…. I absolutely LOVE Emily…. she is doing such a great job…. she gets me and is pushing hard for me…. sometimes on an hr. to hr. basis my schedule is changing… I know that I am busy til the middle of Aug…. I have a meeting w her tomorrow…. I feel her passion… we speak the same language…  I also have other team players on my team, but right now  I’m working hand and hand with these women… OHHHH THE WOMAN IN MY LIFE HOW I LOVE THEE (ALL)

I spent some great quality time w AMY on her drive way just sitting in the middle of her drive way while half the world walked by… we were so united in OUR world that it didn’t matter… I’m sure it did look odd ,but I did not care it was OUR moment and time…. I ended up at the gym and did errands … on the way to my mamas I had a long talk w my sponsor Theresa and was just sobbing while speaking w her… I was crying because she is magical… I was crying because I felt free, she said to me “WELCOME INTO THE WORLD OF BEING LIBERATED THIS IS WHAT IT FEELS LIKE BABY” I knew at that moment that I was relieved of that bondage that has been holding me back and no longer can “it” control me… I will eventually feel comfortable to talk about it…we talked for a long time…. I called AMY sobbing to thank her for her love and accepting all of me….

Today I was in conversation w very influential people that are in my life that I respect and adore… they are my family  in recovery… my sweet GEORGE who I absolutely adore who has alot of time… he is such a rock to me and boy have we danced a dance … I lean on him and just listen to him like a little girl looking at her father… I admire and love that man from Brooklyn… he rates high on my meter… for many reasons ….thank u GEOOOOOORGE! I doubt he reads this but u guys need to know how much I love that man….

I ended up at my homegroup meeting where my sponsie Carly became a secretary at… I came early to help her on her first night. I sat there in awe of this little angel … I can’t believe how far she’s come… thats the beauty of working w others is when u see the lights come on in their eyes… I’ve seen many lights on many men and woman come on and that’s the gift for me…ohhhh I was so proud and am so proud of her…2 meetings in 1 day for me… wooooow! Afterwards Scott, Jeff , Carly and I just sat outside LEH and talked recovery and about our lives for a long long time … I have to say I truly love them and I feel safe around them and we’re just people trying to recover and function in this thing called life. I just felt part of something that was more profound than outside stuff… my spirit was filled all day…the answers came because my house was in order… it was friggin awesome today in my life and in my skin….

learn daily the lesson of trust in the midst of the storms of life. Gods command is the same.be grateful, humble ,calm and loving to all people . Leave each soul the better for having met u or heard u. For all kinds of people, this should be ur attitude, a loving desire to help and an infectious spirit of calmness and trust in God. “U have the answer to loneliness and fear which is calm faith in the goodness and purpose of the universe”… I just love this mediation ….thank u Stretch 🙂



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7 Comments

  1. Wow Jenn!

    I’m so glad you got your ‘house in order’. Something I’m seeking to do daily but am SO fatigued. My spirit has ebbs but physically and emotionally I’m “tired”. I sleep constantly…looking for that deep, true rest for my mind.

    Thx for writing this tonight. I needed to hear it!
    <3

  2. steve says:

    I like this. I’m very happy for u. We’ll have to talk some day. Have a great and SAFE weekend. Take care, Steve

  3. Janet says:

    You are truly beautiful inside and out. I think that you discovered your true beauty and have projected that on to those around you. I am sure they are all wonderful people and wonderful, healthy people attract “like” into their lives. You really are an inspiration to those of us that struggle with addictions in their lives. (Mine is food).

    Thank you for sharing this part of you.

  4. Penny says:

    You’re absolutley right, God is the answer. When you give your life up to Him, anything is possible. You mentioned the other day wondering if people would like you, if you were good enough. In God’s eyes, you are always enough. He loves us all unconditionally, even when we falter. He is always there, ready to accept us when we are ready to turn to Him.

  5. smitty says:

    GOOD TO HERE THAT YOUR LAUGHING AN SMILING.YOUR A POWERFUL BEAUTIFUL WOMAN.I HOPE THAT YOU NEVER CHANGE A THING.HOPING TO SEE MORE OF YOU.CANT WAIT

  6. Dr Lisa says:

    You’re beautiful, inside and out! Thanks for being the contribution you are to the world!

  7. Andrea says:

    Wow, you motivate me! My last drink was 10 1/2 years ago, my last cigarette was six months ago, and I’m just now starting to realize there’s life beyond my role as the perennial party girl. Love your attitude and I’ll be checking in again. And given that my cardio workouts haven’t quite kept off the post-smoking weight, I’ll be following your lead and consulting one of the strength training guys at the gym. Thank you for the boost!

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