Mar
29.
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yes its been a while since i wrote. you  know its taken  its toll on me…not being able to write is not good for me… ill be honest i feel like im about to explode becuz ive even stop in my personal journal… i can be lame and say ive been too busy … not an exception…

im blown away by all u lovely beings… supporting, loving  and cheering me along has been a gift for me…at times i kept asking myself” why the hell am i doing this for”… I DO NOT RUN A SOBERLIVING HOME OR WORK IN RECOVERY IN MY DAILY LIFE…I WAS BROUGHT IN BECAUSE OF MY RECOVERY AND THAT IVE BEEN WHERE THESE PEOPLE HAVE BEEN…the “AWARENESS” SOBERHOUSE 1 &2: has been able to provide   addicts and alcoholics still suffering ,recovering addicts and alcoholics, family/friends /loved ones who live(d) w people like me or have ever loved one of us and have gone thru the torement of our disease w us , is really the reason i did it again…i only say this because it is people like u who email me ,come up to me,post ,comment and all other kinds of modern ways of contact tell me.. then theres “THOSE PEOPLE” ,ahh im praying for u, all these people blogging on messageboards or on tweets  myspace and facebook all this  negative stuff makes me sad… but with every good thing in life comes some bad… over all ,about 97% of the response has been positive, the support and love im getting from people is truly amazing…like everyone else in the world i have over come obstacles… i am a child of  a loving GOD and he has made me ,despite of my down falls ,a woman who has a story to tell… my experience ,strength and hope that miracles do exist…No… what u guys see on t.v is what really happened ,nothing was acted out… i may be an actress but i was dealing with seriously sick people trying to save there lives as well as me staying somewhat sane and sober thru that time in the house… this group was the toughest 8 people i could have ever imagined… it was me against them(more like the disease)…a bit too intense im really lucky i didnt get  hurt or killed…but then theres things u will not see and ohhh the power of editing….like me being super stern, did happen, but first i was kind and gentle but most of the time it was mistaken for weakness and they (most of them) kept pushing my buttons..i want u to know how grateful i am to have been able to be of service…

so LIFE and STYLE MAGAZINE is now coming out in a few weeks 2nd week in APRIL… i will keep u posted.. they pushed it back due to some scandals lately…ive been on planes and cars for the last month…i really love traveling … my schedule starts sometimes at 4:30 am and once in a while ends 2/3a.m… not everyday id lose it…im trying my best to juggle my personal life /love/friends/family,work auditions/producing a show/publicity  (etc .etc on this career section) tending to my house,gym and trying (not really) to have a tiny bit of personal time , 12 step program,speaking at 12 step meetings,working w 6 girls daily ,speaking at hospitals and institutions and working w my sponsor on me, sleeping every now and then oh and walking mickey…ill b honest with u lately im tripping out on  having God fulfill my prayers although i can tell u itll work out for u, but i got to jump and know the net will catch me, it always has before…

im really tired and have to get up in 6 hours to start my journey all over again i promise to make an effort to journal at least 4-6 times a week… i love u with all my heart………oh yes still doing intense training but i got back on salt for a hot minute we started dating off and on again ,but were off again … ill explain tomorrow




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16 Comments

  1. Tamara says:

    Hi Jenn, I am sorry to hear that people would have something negative to say about you. Remember “what people think of you is none of your business”, “some are sicker than others”, and “some people teach me what I want and what I dont want”. Hopefully those will help, also “People that talk dont matter and people that matter dont talk”. I am proud to call you a sober sister. I am sorry that I will be missing the show unless its in Montreal, I will be gone for 2 weeks caring for a sick friend. Make sure to take care of yourself, and be gentle with yourself. Love and Healing Hugs,Tamara

  2. Allie says:

    Your drive, determination and accomplishments are indeed motivating and infectious! Anxious to pick up the Life & Style issue. 😀

  3. traveling fool says:

    Intense, mama! Both SH2 and all the other things you’re doing. I cant wait until the magazine comes out! 🙂

  4. Daniela Conci says:

    Hey Jenn !! I don’t know u but u are a true inspiration to me I love reading ur journal it brings me soooo much hope that I’m gonna be ok I just get soooo over whelmed with everything that happens around me and living with 10 women in early sobriety somtimes really messes me up but reading ur journal I know that there is light at the end of the tunnel . I say those exact words to my self Why the hell do I do what I do . But I now know why to be of service and to pass the message to the still suffering alcoholic or addict I know I’m not alone when I read ur entry’s really does help me get through what I go through at the sober house I run . Thank u again jenn for being a strong women in recovery we need more women like u I wish we had a jenn here in winnipeg !! Thanks again .

  5. Carly B says:

    I’ve never had as much going on as you do, but it sometimes feels like it with all that’s required for my classes. I enjoy reading your posts because it really puts things into perspective. Also, your good friend Jennie Ketcham gave me some really good advice on “Living in the Moment”. You two are amazing.

    By the way, I completely understand the salt addiction, now! I’ve been craving salt like crazy recently and I don’t know why. Love-hate relationship : )

  6. JC says:

    Hi Jen,

    Just wanted to support you and what you are doing. I lost my sister to this disease. She could never get entirely sober. For many years our family watched her struggle. Everyone tried to help her but she just could not make it in the end.

    I just want to thank you for trying to help these people. Stay strong and be true to yourself.

    Your inner strength makes you both beautiful on the inside and outside.

    JC- A new fan

  7. theresa says:

    Wow you are a busy woman!!! It’s good to hear you touch so many lives a day between the girls, the meetings, hospitals and institutions…your gods gift to more that just us on here and i love you for being you 🙂 xoxoxo

  8. Lesley says:

    That was beautiful Jenn.I think God was speaking thru you.

  9. Trish says:

    Stop reading all the negative garbage! You’re doing good (both professionally and personally) – and those people don’t know, therefore…they cannot judge 🙂

  10. Trish says:

    Stop reading all the negative garbage! You’re doing good (both professionally and personally) – and those people don’t know you, therefore…they cannot judge 🙂

  11. Trish says:

    Ooops 😉

  12. jenealle says:

    Hey Jenn…Dont know if you read these posts,but wanted to say way to go, keep up the good work you do..glad you posted again been checking…People who trash talk have no life so to hell with them..lol.Have a great day!!!:)

  13. Erica says:

    Jenn…
    I never blog or comment online but I have to tell you that I’m so proud of you for being strong on the “show” & in life. I would not have delt well with KariAnn. You have the strength of Job! God bless!

  14. I just found your website. Love your journal. Your sobriety and wisdom are inspirational to me. I am also working to lose weight and gain muscle tone. I think you’re a great person, Jenn 🙂

  15. I like the approach you took with this article. It’s not typical that you find something so concise and enlightening.

  16. monica says:

    Hi Jenn, I just want to say I think you are amazing for being able to even handle the Sober House job. I am sorry people are taking their issues out on you…I can’t imagine doing that, facing those people and trying to keep your own recovery on track! I really hope they realize that you are only trying to help them and that you are looking out for their best interests. God Bless and continue to stay strong!

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