Jan
27.
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and then there was today… ive been literally in tears  all day until tonight …im emotionally warned out… the car saga continues but im trusting that tomorrow morning the auto maker will be able to help TOM and myself out… if not more will be revealed … im trusting in GOD…i really need help to learn how to deal with situations like cars… its like talking a foreign lanuage ive never heard of before… at one point i was asking myself “whats there to be grateful for jenn?” but ive been trained to find the good in shitty moments and do a quick gratitude list , then quickly i realize how fortunate i am…TOM again saves the day, he closed down his office to help me…ya so now im do laundry and folding clothes with a smile on my face  and definitely not gonna ask him to help with the bedding 😉 … i have some other things in life going on but its just things… i keep saying ” this too shall pass”… im learning how to handle the big things as well as the small things in life its just uncomfortable at times… well i just finished writing that and my toilet flooded…im sure im covered in fecal (ewwwwwwww) so i threw bleach all over my bathroom and its splattered all over me and my black workout gear is all bleached as well as my body… this is what im talking about  the “things” that overwhelms me….

ok im back and showered…

so i started my journal off with “i cried until tonight”… the one thing i knew would be good for me was going to the gym to workout and DARLENE worked me in thank GOD…so today i started off with Whey Protein shake with a banana and light vanilla yogurt in it, 2 wheat tortilla with cheese and 6 oz of chicken with salt ,pepper and a tablespoon of mayo oh and an energy drink… i did 12 minutes of warm up cardio at high resistance then to train with the boss… intense shoulders, back and triceps exercises and lots of stretching all while holding glutts in and stomach tight then off to do  more cardio 35 more minutes of high resistance… all together 2 hrs of it and back tomorrow at noon… i made such ugly faces and kept forgetting to breathe… man im already sore… when i was in pity mode while crying earlier my stomach was killing me cuz of all the damn sit ups i did last night… i so am not one to like crowded gyms and the last few nights the gym  has  been super crowded… so im going early …

they say” it gets darkest before the dawn” and im hoping for a miracle that my dawn arises soon…



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3 Comments

  1. Tears are a fantastic anti-oxident.

    Tom is an amazing stress reliever.

    You have found your own natro relief without pills or doctors.

    That’s something to be grateful for:)

  2. Susan Lewis says:

    Jennifer, hang in there. I was reading your blog with a lump in my throat, knowing EXACTLY where you are at. Frustrated, overwhelmed, underappreciated and yet clinging onto that sense of gratefulness.

  3. traveling fool says:

    I’m so sorry you were in tears all day honey. 🙁 The little things can overwhelm me, too. I need to remember to look for the good in bad moments, and make a gratitude list. That’s a great idea!

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